Moms give birth to a child, take care of a child, raise that child not to be a serial killer, have good table manners and somehow grow up to have their own kids. On the side she takes care of the house, changes light bulbs, cooks meals, defrosts, wears high heels, take care of that man she married, and finds time to read a book, write a journal, start a blog and retouch her manicure.
Now that I’m a mother myself, I sometimes wonder where I get the energy. And then I think about the thousands of mothers out there who are in the same boat as I am. Hey, mother-to-mother, you’re the shiznaz, lady.
Of course we all have our little tips and tricks in order to achieve super mom-ness or to simply stay sane. They don’t have to be mind-blowing, earth-shaking discoveries. Sometimes, what our mush brains need are the simplest things.
Breastfeeding. As a stay-at-home-mom, I have the privilege of directly breastfeeding my child on-demand. Sure I tried to pump, store and bottle-feed, but that was more trouble for me! I’m glad to take these steps off my to-do list: sterilizing, washing and keeping bottles, pumping, storing milk, cleaning the pump, storing the pump, bringing the pump. After 5 attempts with 5 different bottle brands, I decided to just pump for sharing milk and feed Basti direct. Sure it entails a bit of sacrifice: no nights out, no going to places where kids aren’t welcome, challenging shopping choices (everything has to have boob-access), going to meetings with the baby, etc. But it also meant I never had to worry about Basti’s feedings, EVER. And it made for a very light diaper bag too.
Put the makeup on, lady. Motherhood can be stressful, but you don’t have to look it! In the early (and bleary-eyed) days of motherhood, prettying up was low on my awareness list. A glimpse of myself in a mall window reflection stopped me in my tracks. WHO THE HELL WAS THAT. I am blessed that my husband thinks that new clothes, parlor visits and manicures are necessities, not luxuries. He thinks part of our contribution to this earth is being beautiful, as the fairer sex. This is how our conversation usually goes when it’s on this subject.
Me: “Babe, I need new clothes. Can I buy a new dress?”
The Painter: “Make it two!”
Me: “Babe, I’m going to the salon to get my hair done.”
The Painter: “Good!”
He’s a man of few words. Short, but effective. Hehe. Artists!! I love them!!
Also, my friends know this: I almost never go out without concealer, eyebrows, blush and gloss. Be it the grocery, the pediatrician, a milk-tea run, whatever. You never know who you might run to in this little village called Metro Manila and looking decent does a lot for your self-esteem when you do see someone you know. I’m done making excuses. “I just gave birth” lost its credibility a few months ago and “Gosh, sorry I’m so harassed” is just sad. Happy, pretty mom = happy baby.
Creative and purposeful procrastination. There are probably a million and one minute issues I should deal with everyday, but I choose not to. I’ve learned that there are things that simply don’t need or deserve my attention. Right now I need every bit of oomph I can get to keep up with my titter-tottering toddler who has a liking for taking baths in the toilet bowl and rolling around on the kitchen floor. This is a time when procrastinating works for me. I used to have to-do lists, now I have to-do scraps. As in scraps of paper. When something comes to mind, I take a piece of paper – a receipt, the corner of a flyer, a piece of the neighbor’s newspaper (I know, I know) – and I write it down. It can be something as inane as “Buy a new sponge” or something like, “Read the Book of Esther again and review the points of a submissive biblical woman”. When I clean out my pockets, my purse or Basti’s diaper bags, I dump all these scraps into the top drawer of my desk organizer and go through them. The immediate matters get typed in to my iPhone with an alarm, and the rest get saved for later. Or blogged. Like this entry.
Shrug it off. There are days when the laundry isn’t done. Or the floor isn’t that clean. Or your bed is in shambles. Or your lunch menu reads like a bad diner’s blackboard. Or the baby didn’t bathe today. So what? You’re allowed to a lapse here and there, and there’s no good that can come out from feeling guilty about it. I used to be such a control-freak and I let that go when a huge part of my life became subject to the schedule of a little person. I’ve learned to accept my imperfections, knowing that I will be forgiven for them.
Be the best you can be, according to your rules. Who wouldn’t want to be a cloth-diapering, breastfeeding, eco-friendly, BPA-free, germ-free, all-natural, low-sodium, organic household? I did cloth-diapering until I just couldn’t anymore. I buy organic when I can and only IF I can. While I want to homeschool, I’m open to sending Basti to pre-school for a few years so I could possibly have another child, or just regain my wits. At the end, we’re all just trying to be the best mothers we can be. I’ve learned to ignore sanctimonious people who judge other moms who raise their children apart from what they think SHOULD be the way (i.e. THEIR way and no one else’s). Whether you’re a Tiger Mother, or a pansy, a breastfeeder or a formula-user, a hands-on mother or a three-nanny household, we all share a common denominator: we deal. We find our balance. We do our best and pray that we don’t fail (but we do, sometimes!)
So what are your ways to Super Mom-ness? Share them and get a chance to win these fabulous prizes from KFC:
- Feature in Lifestyle Network
- Feature in Working Mom magazine
- 1 year supply of KFC bucket meals (54 buckets)
- Manila Ocean Park Ultimate Experience
- Hotel H2O Overnight Accommodation
- Anti-stress body wrap and mind and body flow massage from The Spa
While all moms are good, KFC is looking for the Super Moms that are SO GOOD. Log on to www.kfc.com.ph/supermom, register, post a picture of you and your family enjoying a KFC bucket and share your own tips for being the Super Mom that you are. It can be anything, from how you find time for yourself, for your family, or how you balance work and family life.
SO GOOD, right? I’d love it if you would leave a comment and share your tips with me too!